Good night, Gracie

Dear readers,

It is with a lot of careful consideration and both trepidation and excitement that I have decided it is the time to retire Harlow's Monkey, both the blog and my own personal identity attached to the blog.

This should come to no surprise to most who have been reading for a while. I have found it increasingly more difficult to blog here, both because of the time involved in blogging and because of how busy my "real" life has become. But another factor - the most important one - has led to my decision to quit Harlow's Monkey.

When I started this blog I was just one small voice, using this technology to communicate with other Korean adoptees. I found a whole community of others out there and made some wonderful, life-long friendships. However, it was never my intention to become an adoption expert. I was doing what always came naturally to me anyway - writing about my life. As an avid journal-writer and emerging creative writer, I found blogging was a great compliment to my creative desires.

Blogging about adoption also complimented the work I was doing in my "real" life professionally. When I started blogging I was just another graduate student and a working mother. I had a passion to advocate on behalf of adult adoptees, especially in the public realm, because I'd felt our voices as a collective were so silenced. Little did I know that this blog would become personified and grow beyond my wildest imagination. I did not expect to become so connected to the larger discussion of adoption outside my own small little world.

But being "Harlow's Monkey" no longer fits, right now. There are more things in this world I want to write about. I want to write about mothering, about social justice and social work. I want to write about spirituality and ethics. I want to write more poems and short stories. I'm committing time towards working collaboratively around issues of race, gender, sex and (dis)ability equity in education. I want to spend more time writing about and advocating on behalf of parenting a child with a special needs diagnosis.

Being "Harlow's Monkey" has been a tremendous gift and - at times - a burden. Writing this blog has led to some amazing opportunities, and I thank each and every one of you who has invited me to a conference, asked my opinion for a news story, or invited me to write for your publication. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Yet the blog and all the related work (responding to inquiries, questions and emails, speaking engagements, etc) has also been like having a part-time job on top of my real-life job and graduate school and parenting and community work. And it's largely been on my own time and dollar. 

It is time to become more intentional in my life. For the next few years I'm focusing on my research and dissertation. It is likely that I'll attempt to write some books, including perhaps a compilation of my writings from the blog. I'll still be around, but I'm stepping away from Harlow's Monkey. Call it a sabbatical if you will. If you're still interested in what's on my mind, I'm sure it won't be too difficult to find me out there on the internets. I still haven't quite figured out what to do with this actual blog, but my professional blog is jaerankim.wordpress.com

Again, thanks to all of you who have read and found something thought provoking through the blog. And most of all, my deepest thanks to those of you who have been there since the beginning and have helped me become who I am today.

Comments

[Maureen]

You have made an immeasurable impact in the world of fellow adoptees and adoption, Jae Ran. I have been very moved by what you have contributed. I wish you and your family all the best and extend my sincere gratitude for giving voice to what needed to be said. As a parent of children with special needs, I applaud your desire to be an advocate for your child. I hope the future brings you nothing but success in all of your endeavours.

[cndmom]

Thank you for the time and effort you put into this blog. I've found it invaluable in my journey as an adoptive mom. I wish you nothing but the best in your future endevors and will be looking forward eagerly to your newest works

[Lori]

Thank you Jae Ran. My students and I have benefited so much from your work--it's always top of the "blog roll" in my course on the history of adoption and foster care in the US. I will be sad to see you go, but excited to read whatever you choose to do next!

[Alana]

As usual, very well said. I'm so grateful for this blog, but I'm also happy for you that you knew when it was time to move on to other things. Thanks again for sharing your perspective and best of luck!

[An adoptive parent]

Thank you for all you have done.

[Sparky]

I'm sorry to see you go. I've learned so much from this blog. I think I am a wee bit better AP because I stopped by and read what you had to say. Thank you so much.

[Bryna @ It Takes a Shtetl to Foster A Child]

Thank you so, so much for everything you've given to adoptees, first mothers, adoptive and foster families, and everyone interested in justice for children and families. I am so sad this blog will cease to exist, but I'm thrilled for you that you are responding to your needs and the needs of your family and going to give yourself a break from being Harlow's Monkey (which has to be a tiresome job indeed). All my best to you

[Amy in NC]

Thank you for putting your voice out there. All the best to you!

[Shannon Gibney]

Rock on, gurl...And as always, THANK YOU! xoxo

[dawn]

Congratulations on moving toward the next stage of your life. Thank you so much for sharing your work here and allowing so many of us to benefit from your wisdom. See you on the flip side!!!!!

[OmegaMom]

Thank you for doing what you have done, JaeRan. Your blog has been invaluable to me--and to the international/transracial adoption community. Your voice will be missed! Enjoy your future endeavors.

[Sue G-R]

I wouldn't have met you without this blog and for that I am very grateful. I will miss your links and commentary. I admire you tremendously!

[Thandi]

While I'll miss your writing, I understand.Thank you for educating me.

[Liz]

I have learned a tremendous amount from reading your blog, and I am very thankful that you took the time to write here. Good luck with all your future work, it sounds exciting and I'm glad that you were able to recognize that it's time to move on.

[Julia]

Very sorry to see you go but of course I completely understand why it's time to move on.

Your voice will be missed.

[Tanya]

Another adoptive parent who'll miss you. I hope you'll keep us updated on your endeavors. Thank you for your thoughtfulness and dedication!
Best,
Tanya

[maia]

Thank you for all your amazing work and insight over the years. You've helped me become a better parent to my child. Your writing has truly been a gift to the adoptive community.

[Paula O.]

I hope you know this, but it's important enough to be said again - I want you know how thankful I am to have found your voice when I was just starting to find the courage to use my own. The mirror I found in you was honestly one of most signficant things that has ever happened in my life - as a person and as an adoptee. I know I'm just one of many, many adoptees who has found kinship and solidarity in your voice and in your work.

And beyond that, you're just an awesome woman, mother and friend who I know will continue to accomplish amazing and incredible things in her life.

Till the next time over bibimbap,

Love,
p

[Thorn]

Thank you for all you've done as Harlow's Monkey. I'm glad you'll be able to move on and write as yourself more fully!

[Yoli]

I will miss you so much. You have been my teacher and this place my university. Thank you, a million times thank you. Wishing you the best that life has to offer.

[Molly]

Thank you for all the work and thoughtful commentary over the years - I've learned a lot from you. Best wishes on you future ventures.

[Kimberly]

Thank you for all that you have given of yourself as Harlow's Monkey. I've learned so much over the years and now wish you the best on your future endeavours.

[Mei Ling]

As a fellow adoptee, I'm really sad to see you go.

But - specifically because I'm a fellow adoptee - I can understand how Real Life gets in the way and sometimes, it's just better to move onto other blogging avenues and topics.

Thanks for the comments you left at my reunion blog - and for being an advocate for the many complex issues in transracial adoption. :)

[joy-joy]

will totally miss you!

[Patricia]

Thank you for being such an important voice for adoptees and for the wonderful insight you have provided. You will be missed!

[Theresa East]

Thank you for opening up and sharing with all of us! Best of luck to you and your family and your upcoming projects...you are one busy woman. :)

Theresa

[Bob Striker]

As another AP who's been reading you for a while, let me add my thanks to the others that have already been posted.

I do hope that you will keep the blog up on the web for those on their own journeys to discover.

Best of luck to you Jae Ran! I hope our paths will cross sometime.

[Lisa Pious]

I know your target audience is not APs, but as one myself I've looked to your writing for clarity in the complex world of adoption. I have learned so much reading this blog and I love your writing. Thank you. All the best as you re-focus!

[Theresa]

Goodbye and thank you.

It was adoptee bloggers like you that made me feel I had something to say. When adoptees are taught that their voice doesn't matter, that's a very big thing indeed.

You will be so very missed.

[Reena]

I am an AP who will miss your posts, but I understand the need to move onward.

I wish you all the best in your current and future endeavors. I will look forward to seeing your around the blogosphere.

[Julie]

Thank you for all of your work.

[Julia]

I am so grateful for your voice here in this space.

And I wish you all the best in your next endeavor.

[John Raible]

Congratulations on taking the reins of life into a new direction. Your writing has been inspiring to me as a fellow blogger on race and adoption. I look forward to welcoming you into the ranks of adult adoptee scholars with actual doctorates! In the near future, mind you! Onward and upward.

[YoonSeon]

You'll be greatly missed throughout the adoption blogosphere. But whatever you do, I wish you all the luck in the world. :-)

[Jeremy Hulley]

Thanks so much. I'll be moving on to read your professional blog.

[Liz]

Goodbye Harlow's Monkey. The blogosphere won't be the same without you. Congrats on such a wonderful run. Best of luck in the future.

[Soo]

Thank you for your writing. You are one of the first adoptee voices I discovered and gave me courage to start writing, too. Best of luck to you in the future.

[bwrites]

I'll miss the blog, but I'm glad you're doing what's right for you. Thanks for everything.

[Mary Dell]

Thank you so much for everything you've written here over the years.

[Sharon]

I've really appreciated your essays too. I like the idea of compiling some into a book. They are definitely worth preserving and sharing.

Sometimes the name of your blog reminds me that I'm a cloth-covered monkey. But it also reminds me to strive to be the plushest cloth-covered monkey I can be, and not just some old wire monkey.

[Margie]

You have been and are a clear and unwaivering voice for justice in adoption and every other facet of life. Thank you, JaeRan, for the time and care you have taken here to share your wisdom.

I hope you will find a way to let your readers know when and where you will be writing on adoption and other subjects.

Wishing you all the very best in the future.

[Diane]

Thank you for your powerful voice expressed here. JaeRan- This place is an invaluable resource to all members of the adoption triad. I am very grateful for the time and energy that you have spent creating this space. I have turned here for direction and have found more than direction...I have found support and resources. Thank you so much. Best wishes as you move forward.

[Brick]

You are going to be missed. xxxxxxxx

[Susanne]

you will be missed. As an AP I have learned and been provoked to think.
I hope the site will still be there for us to keep re-reading your thoughts.
All the best for your future and thank you for the time you have spent to educate.
Susanne

[Heather]

Thank you for giving so much of your time, your energy, and your self to this space over the years. I, for one, have deeply appreciated it. Best wishes in this newest phase!

[Pix]

All good things come to an end and it's great that you have completed this part of your journey! You certainly have been a strong voice, and a much needed voice in the adoption community. Your experience and insight will be missed greatly. Thanks for all you've done. Best of luck on your new ventures.
Pixie--
Cheese Curds and Kimchi

[Lynette]

You've taught me so much through your words and experiences and I am forever grateful. It is from the knowledege gained on this site that I will be a better AP to my son.

Best of luck to you!

[Melanie Recoy]

You've done good work here. Thank you.

[Valentina]

I was so thankful for your voice here. Thank you for all of the hours, dollars, thought, time and work spent.

Good luck with your dissertation and expanded writings. Great topics you have in mind.

[Jung Mee]

Thank you! Look forward to book!~