Harlow's Monkey

A different way of thinking about orphanages in Africa

Thanks to Rich for the link. From the New York Times, an article about an innovative and different way of dealing with orphans in Tanzania.

“In less wealthy nations, people are being very creative,” said Kathryn Whetten, an expert on orphan care from Duke University. She had not seen the orphanage in Berega or encountered others like it. But that did not surprise her. Little is known about orphan care in Africa, she said, because little research has been done. On a recent trip to Moshi, a Tanzanian city of about 150,000, she said, local officials knew of three orphanages. She and her colleagues found 25 there, most with 10 to 25 children each.

The orphanage here, started in 1965 by United German Mission Aid, an evangelical Christian mission, began recruiting relatives to move in about five years ago. Ute Klatt, a German missionary and nurse who has been director of the orphanage for 10 years, said she learned about the practice from another orphanage in Tanzania. Now many of the children at the orphanage are cared for by a teenage girl from the extended family — a binti, in Swahili — often a sister, cousin or aunt, who lives with them and learns how to take care of them.

The young women come to love the children, and will look after them when they leave the orphanage, Ms. Klatt said. In addition, the bintis, some of whom have never been to school, gain some education. Ms. Klatt provides schoolbooks, she said, and the young women study and teach one another in the evenings. Many arrive illiterate and leave knowing how to read. She also teaches them the basics about health, and they learn sewing and batik, and share the cooking in an outdoor kitchen.“Before we had this system, the families weren’t visiting, and it was hard to reintegrate the children,” Ms. Klatt said. “There were attachment disorders.”

This last paragraph really struck a chord with me.

Ms. Klatt said it had been her dream since childhood to work as a missionary in Africa, though she had never imagined running an orphanage. She said one of her greatest rewards was when older children who had been in her care came back to visit, and were obviously healthy and happy, living with their families back in their home villages.

It would not surprise me at all if Ms. Klatt has been advised to begin an adoption program. I know that others who have gone to Africa to begin or work for orphanages in other countries have found that starting adoption programs have been one way to provide funding - then pretty soon the operations become about international adoptions. Especially since so many of these children are the high demand infants that people want to adopt.

You can read the entire article here.

Reading with chopsticks

Last week our family went on our summer vacation and since I have been reading nothing but academic textbooks about research, statistics and public policy and social work theory, I needed something to read that was purely for fun.

That is how I ended up bringing along only food writing. The Fortune Cookie Chronicles by Jennifer 8 Lee was the first one I read. How fitting that by the time I'd finished this book, my adoptive parents (who we were vacationing with) took us out to a Chinese buffet. Everything I'd learned from Jennifer 8 Lee was experienced first hand.

Growing up, my only experience of "Asian" food was a local joint in town that was what I lovingly refer to as a "greasy chopstick" (like, greasy spoon, Asian style - I know, silly).  This place was teeny tiny, and was mostly take-out. My parents typically ordered the same thing - some kind of an egg foo young and chicken chow mein with loads of celery and a thick gravy and the toasted brown crispy noodles in a separate bag that we tossed on top. Our trips to Chinese take-out were infrequent and my parents often complained about how sticky the rice was. Like a lot of Euro-Americans, their idea of rice was Uncle Ben's style - the kind of rice that doesn't stick together and is nearly impossible to eat with chopsticks.

Reading The Fortune Cookie Chronicles brought me back to my childhood, big time. I've always wondered why every little small town in the middle of nowhere still seems to have a Chinese restaurant. Now I know why.

As a Korean adoptee, who was raised without any connection or knowledge about my country of origin, those rare dinners of fake-Chinese food at the little hole-in-the-wall take out joint and the Asian person at the register were the only small pieces of "Asia" in my childhood. After I became an adult, I looked to dine at Chinese restaurants where the Asian customers outnumbered the White ones; I asked my Asian-immigrant friends and co-workers where they dined, knowing their highest praise for a restaurant was one that reminded them of home. Thankfully, I had some caring friends who had come to America from all over central and southeast Asia. They looked at me, and felt sorry for me; that I was so lost and ignorant about my ethnicity. They were patient and kind, and it is no exaggeration to say that a lot of my cultural education happened around a table sharing a meal together.

I still submit happily to fake-Chinese food, but I have to say I consider myself very lucky that I can choose from several Korean restaurants now. And the true test for me will be when I learn enough Korean cooking that I can make it at home. While I know that no matter how true to form I become in my Korean cooking skills, I will never be able to replace the experience of growing up as a Korean or Korean American, I'm happy that I'm able to give my own children some of that experience. For them, a dinner of kimchijigae, bulgogi, or chapchae isn't unusual. They are used to coming with me to the Korean grocers, helping me pick out ingredients for dinner. They don't flinch at big jars of kimchi in the fridge or bags of dark, green roasted nori in the cupboard. Even more, they are learning how to cook Korean food along with their mom. Something that makes me wistful, because I didn't have that for myself. I'll have to be content with having my Korean American friends act as my mentor in that respect. As in my early 20s, it is these Korean friends who have shown incredible kindness to me. They are patient and kind. And what a gift they are giving me, by teaching me so I can teach my children - whether at the stove or around the dinner table.

Do white adoptive fathers of black or biracial-black daughters get a pass?

One of my favorite blogs had this post this past week - The Race™-Approved White Guys.

Authors AJ Plaid and Fiqah write,

[W]e’ve composed a list of white guys who are deemed The Race™-sanctioned—any Black female performer can be seen with these white performers and know she’s doing right by Us™. Our criteria:

1. We know they’ve dated, are dating, are married to, have and/or have babies by Black women. (Having Black or Black biracial daughters, adopted or biological, is an added bonus. ‘Cause, as some of us wanna believe, if the white guy can touch/sex up/adopt/father a sistah, they can not possibly be…well, you know the rhetoric.)
2. They can actually have performing-arts skills. (This leaves out Kevin “K-Fed” Federline.)
3. They’re famous in their own right. (This kinda sorta leaves out Gabriel Aubry. Some early men-watchers know him as a model. But many more know him for siring Halle Berry’s baby. If you don’t believe us, say Aubry’s name and “model.” Then say Aubry’s name and “Halle Berry’s baby’s daddy.” Record the results.)
4. We get the 6^th Sense* that they’ve been with sistahs but aren’t talking about it.
5. We sistahs have sensed the sexual tension between these dudes and the sistahs on-screen.
6. They’re not Justin Timberlake.

I don't know...I've known plenty of White adoptive fathers who still have racist views towards Black women and men. In fact, I don't agree with the idea that just having a black or biracial daughter, adopted or not, gives white man a pass.

ETA: I guess the adopting-black-kids part was supposed to be tongue-in-cheek and part of the humor of the post. Maybe it's my post grad-year dementia, but I didn't get that part of the humor when I read this post!!!

Transracial adoption - the musical

Anika Larsen of 'Shafrika, the White Girl.'

Thanks to a tip from Laura, I found out about a musical currently playing off-broadway about a woman who grew up in a transracial adoptive family. Shafrika, the White Girl is the white, biological child in the family. Written and starring Anika Larsen about her own multi-racial family.

Neil Genzlinger from the New York Times takes the typical description of the topic of transracial adoption:

There are a number of things to admire in “Shafrika, the White Girl,” an autobiographical musical by Anika Larsen at the Vineyard Theater, and foremost among them are Ms. Larsen’s parents, who in the portrayal here embody a quiet heroism that isn’t seen much in this age of perfectly planned families (full review here).

Marilyn Stasio from Variety goes further in her praise of the play:

Larsen tells her own story of growing up in Cambridge, Mass., with nine brothers and sisters, several of them adopted from war-wrecked countries like Vietnam and Cambodia and a few of them deeply troubled, indeed.  Even if you take into account that her hippie parents were trust-fund babies, their idealistic vision of creating "a microcosm of the world" -- and fixing its troubles in the cradle -- is as sweet and unselfish as it gets (the entire review is here).

Reviewer Adam Perlman at Theater Mania wrote:

The main problem is that Larsen doesn't know how to handle the contradictions inherent in family life; for example, how can people love and yet hurt each other or how you can be on the inside and outside at once? Larsen's confusion has led to a show that's not so much about this legitimately unique family as about her processing it. We watch as she relives her memories and thinks aloud about them...A large multi-racial cast, clad in brightly colored sweatshirts out of a 1970s kids show, plays the Larsen family with warm, convivial sportsmanship. Every re-enacted reminiscence seems selected because of how it made Larsen feel as a child, yet they have been reconstructed with the clear eyes of an adult -- one who seems terrified of offending anyone. The sharp and scary edges of the memories are dulled to the point they all register as a big "so what?" Surely, Larsen must have had memories more fraught than solving the mystery of who wrote on the living room wall (click here for the entire review).

Honestly a few things stand out to me. Why is the title character's name "Shafrika?" Am I supposed to be amused that the white girl has an ethnic/African sounding name? Should I be impressed that one of the musical numbers is, as Stasio describes,

raising the rafters with that gospel-inflected voice of hers in "Glory, Glory," or enthusiastically shaking her booty -- appropriately enough, in the well-executed schoolyard chant, "Shake Ya Booty."

Maybe it was the producing theater's tease of "With a name like Shafrika, it's gotta be a blonde girl from Cambridge, Massachusetts, right?" Oh, ha ha. I GET THE IRONY!!

What about the play's poster ad?

or their YouTube promo:

Or maybe, once again, it's not the adoptee's point of view that is central to the story, that I find problematic.

Nah. I think there's plenty other reasons to be cynical of this play.

Madonna's daughter Mercy flown to London

From People Magazine

Mercy Chifundo James, the 3-year-old toddler adopted by Madonna, was secretly flown from her home country of Malawi into London early Saturday morning.

"A private jet flew in from South Africa and collected her at five minutes to six last evening," an airport source tells PEOPLE. "She connected to London from Johannesburg at 10:30 p.m."

Read the rest here.

Happy Father's Day

To the father of my great and awesome kids, to the fathers and grandfathers in my life, to all my friends who are fathers.

PostSecret father's day

From PostSecret

Vietnamese adoptee reunited with his birth family

'Mistaken' Vietnamese orphan to meet lost dad after 34 years

Bruce Ward, Ottawa Citizen

Published: Friday, May 29, 2009

OTTAWA - Thirty-four years after he was mistakenly whisked away from a Saigon orphanage, Thanh Campbell - Orphan 32 - is returning to his homeland.

Campbell, one of 57 children spirited from a Saigon orphanage to Canada in April 1975, is returning Saturday to be reunited with his biological father and the brothers who never stopped searching for him after losing him in the chaotic fall of Saigon.

Read the entire article here.

Food Network contestant, Korean American Debbie Lee

Did anyone catch the Food Network's Debbie Lee on the reality show, The Next Food Network Star? I have to say so far I'm not terribly impressed. She seems fairly natural but in a way, something about her personality turns me off. The way she went about the first challenge made me question her integrity. And I didn't like how she practically bragged that she doesn't speak Korean. But her food looks good - and I would love to see the Food Network have a regular Asian American host of a show. So far, I've not been too impressed with their record, although this past year they have included three African American hosted shows.

Another Korean adoptee in the Korean newspaper

Adoptee teaches dreams, not just English

May 30, 2009

	Mathew McGrath teaches English to a student in Chunga Elementary School. By Song Bong-geun

The good people who give something back to a community are considered angels. What makes them so good is they bestow tangible gifts and fill people’s hearts with hope.

Mathew McGrath, 23, a Korean adoptee from the United States, embodies this spirit by encouraging self-confidence and dreams in students at Chunga Elementary School through English education after school.

You can read the entire article here.